Monday, December 1, 2014

Not My Circus - Not My Monkeys!

Yeah, I'm tired.  Officially worn out three weeks before Christmas.  I should be feeling excited about the holidays.  Like most of my friends, I feel some type of stress, anxiety and even moments of depression most days.  I have to remind myself that God does not intend for me to live this way.  More importantly I chose JOY a while back and I feel it slowly slipping from my hands.

So, after careful navigation of surviving my son's 10th birthday and Thanksgiving, I'm declaring: NOT MY CIRCUS-NOT MY MONKEYS!  Say it with me!  I've taken on the drama, foolishness (let's call it what it really is) and problems of other people that I can't solve, don't need to deal with or is simply none of my business.

I'm NOT your ringmaster!

I have my daily battles and drama that is often self-inflicted or misdirected my way.  So, I'm pretty busy most days. I have my own three-ring circus and more monkeys than I can handle.  I don't need to live under anyone else's big tent.  I have my own.

A part of choosing JOY is choosing which battles to fight and standing on your own for what's best for you.  It's not easy, but very doable.  I have learned to say NO. However, human socialization expects a reason, but we offer excuses instead.  I say NO if I can't make it happen.  More importantly, I say NO if I DON'T want to.  The latter is very difficult for most people, especially family and friends to understand.  It is what it is.  I'm okay with it and so should others. 

The monkeys aren't trained, but manipulated.

I know manipulation oh too well.  The ringmaster manipulates the monkeys to do certain tricks at the expense of making others laugh and feel good. Ultimately, the monkeys aren't free to do whatever they do.  I'm not a monkey in your circus.  (REPEAT!)  I no longer allow others to manipulate me in doing things that only satisfy their emotions, spirit or well-being.  I know how this circus trick works.  I admit that I can be pretty good at it if when needed to do so. 

So, I'm exiting your tent.  I'm leaving all of the excitement and drama to you. I've performed in way too many circuses this year and it's time to retire. I plan to have more JOY.  I choose laughing over hurting.  I choose love over lust.  I choose living over being. 

#NotMyCircusNotMyMonkeys  #NotYourRingmaster #IChooseJoy  #LivingOverBeing

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